My Siblings

What can i say here. This subject could fill volumes. We could of had our own McMillan Chicken Soup for the Whatever Series. Pretty well every book written by the Chicken Soup Guy www.chickensoup.com was an episode at our house. When I look back, it is nothing but good memories, but when I look at separate incidents it is a little different. It was actually a pretty cool way that we used to run things. 6 kids.  It was simple. The oldest brother got to beat up all the younger brothers. It was his right being the oldest and all. Next in line. He got to beat up all below him and so on. It was quite simple all the way down. It did start to get a little complicated around me. Here is the problem, the only two below me were my sister, and the whole "hitting girls" thing took that power away. (although there was the "accidental" push down the stairs incident, which I continue to deny to this day. My story is she slipped).
Anyway, I was fourth in line, and my parents go and have a girl of all things. That was not fair, I had nobody to pound out. My older brothers all had somebody to pound out. I had nobody. Not of course until little brother Steven showed up, my life had finally turned around, I just needed him to get a little bit older, and than I was was clear to pound him out. It was showtime. Keep in mind that although I was not allowed to pound out Laura, there were ways of tormenting her, and I came up with some beauties. For instance I changed her name to Larry. That bugged her a lot. I would also (this is a beauty) - I would knock on her bedroom door and say Laura...I ...love.....youuuu. She hated that more than anything. There was nothing more gross than your brother yelling out "I love you" for everybody to here. It was sweet music to my ears as she would run to Mom screaming and crying MOMMMMMMM!!! Michael said he loves me again, Make him stop.  - I was evil.
I waited until Steven got old enough. My revenge on my older brothers would be bittersweet. Once he was old enough it could begin. I would wait for my opportunities to pound him out. It was great. Finally, all the pounding outs I had taken could be passed on. ***oversight*** One thing I did not figure on though was this. My oldest brothers , the ones that were laying a pounding on me all these years, now decided to get a conscience, and so they would like to protect little Steven. So it was quite simple. I would pound Steven out, than I would get pounded out. This sucked. And then to add insult to injury something happened that nobody saw coming.  Something that put the whole "pounding out" equilibrium out of sync. One day I was watching TV, not long after a successful pounding out of Steven, I was just laying on the floor, elbow on the floor, head on my hand, flicking channels with my toes....... quite relaxed actually and then he appeared. It was premeditated. (5 minutes earlier)........Steven took the time to go up to his room. He went into his closet and took out only one of his black 'Sunday go to meeting shoes' and put it on his right foot. He walked down into the room where I was in my state of relaxation. I lay there and I think he looked at my head as though it was a football on a tee, ready for kickoff at an Argo game. And then it happened. One swift kick with his one black shoe, a direct blow to my head. Retribution was his. He had turned the whole brotherly hierarchy upside down. The pounding outs of Steven seemed to slow down a bit after that......and of course today, Tippy (as we like to call him) is one of my best friends. There might be a lesson in there somewhere, I'll let you decide that.
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