After deliberation with my private Sports Psychologist Bob Simpson ......it kind of confirmed what I planned on talking about Thursday night at the Owen Sound Minor Lacrosse Awards Banquet.
Sandy Barfoot's introduction of me was humbling to say the least. She is an incredible person....and I just want to thank her for everything.
I thought I should talk about something I know about. I have played lacrosse for 48 years, so I am considering myself an expert (although for those of you at the Masters Lacrosse Provincials last week, you might question that).
I love this game. That is the message I wanted to share. And I play for the love of the game. Nothing else.
Me with my Clarkson Lorne Park team in 1971 (top row - 3rd from right)
There are many different articles on Extrinsic and Intrinsic Motivation...here is the link for a good one.
http://sportspsych.wikispaces.com/file/view/OG_Intrinsic+and+extrinsic+motivation+in+sport.pdf
But in an easy to understand words:
Extrinsic Motivation - You are playing for somebody else (friends, parents etc.) or something else (medals, awards).
Intrinsic Motivation - You are playing for yourself. You love the game.....and can't wait to play.
.....or as Bob put it in an email to me.....You are not playing for your parents, friends, etc. you are playing for the love of the game. If you play for somebody else, you will never be happy. If you play because it is fun to play, you will play until you are 60.
I explained to my audience to think about what brought them to this game....try to remember...was it a sibling that played, your parents or a relative....was it watching Pro Lacrosse?? - What made you want to pick up a stick to begin with?
I know this. For me...I had a stick at birth (well almost) - everybody in Clarkson had a lacrosse stick from a young age, and we took it every where. But there was one defining thing for me that brought me to love the game. That was the Meadowwood Rd. Backyard Tennis Ball Lacrosse League. What I liked about this league?? - No Referees, no coaches, no parents...no registration, no time limit on the games, no number of players needed to play......whoever showed up, we played. Two of us, would take shots on each other. 6 of us would play 3 on 3.........13 of us would play 7 on 6 etc. It was so much fun. It was lacrosse. We would play for hours and hours.....eat.....and play again.
Guess what happened? We got better....and better. Our stick skills improved, our hand-eye coordination got better and we enjoyed ourselves.
This is the basis of Intrinsic Motivation. You play for the love of the game, and because you love the game, you try harder and you get better, because you love the game....and the cycle repeats.
Funny thing is, in my recent trip to Lake Placid, we were basically playing a style of lacrosse, a little different than the U.S. teams.....we were playing Backyard Lacrosse....and it was fun......and that is why a group of plus 45 year old guys were playing....it was flat out fun lacrosse....oh, and our GF (goals for) in the tournament were the highest....by 10 goals (out of 16 teams).
My message at the Banquet was not only that you need to enjoy what you are doing, but if you are not, you have to try and understand why. That is an important question.
As a player, are you doing your part? - Are you working on your stick skills between games and practices?? (If not - why not?) - Do you come ready to play? Are you in good condition? Try doing these things and see if your enjoyment increases.
The other important item is the sport "triangle" I like to call it. I am talking about the interaction of player/parent and player/coach and coach/parent........this is a subject for a whole new blog or perhaps a series.....a lot to talk about here. But again, to simplify....we need to understand that this dynamic is different for every single athlete.....and we all need to understand this in order to make the playing experience better for the athlete.
Here are a couple of my thoughts:
Coaches. - Understand that parents are concerned about their kids, and want them to do well....help to explain where the athlete needs help. - understand that every athlete is different (skill level, fitness and size, sport IQ, and character)...and it takes different drills and words to motivate different players.
Parents – Continue to support your kids like you are doing.....but think of more ways to help...if you can't play lacrosse maybe you have a baseball glove – play catch – go for a run with them..there is so much we can do. Let the coaches coach. It is a hard job.
Athletes – Understand that your parents want the best for you....but you need to show them you are serious....here is an idea, get your school work done without being asked...because you want to “play the game” - it is up to you to eliminate the stress.....be ready to play. - Understand that all coaches are different...and that you need to be flexible in order to get through practice...a coach cannot run a separate practice for each one of you...you need to do what it takes to practice and play like a team. - show up prepared to play, focused on the task, and in condition.
Try it. See what happens. Let me know if your "fun factor" rises.
The greatest thing about my talk last night was the Beautiful people of Owen Sound. It is such a great town, and such a great sports town. They really know how to host events.....year after year. The people are hospitable and friendly. I first played there in 1981 with the Owen Sound North Stars.....drove up with my pal from Kindergarten, Stu Aird.....we had a blast. I last played there.....this summer, in the Cubby Cruickshank Memorial Masters tournament that is held every summer. Things have not changed. Lots of smiles and handshakes. (30 years later)
I love this game.
**NOTE** After helping to coach the U19 girls team this year, I recognized a need that I think will not only improve the fun level for the girls, it could also improve attendance at practices and games. I had the prototype at the banquet and hope to go into full production next year.
I call it the "Text Stick"
Jessica and Tristen holding the new "Text Stick"
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